Introducing Addison Joei

When i was little and people always asked me what i wanted to be when i grew up. i always answered "to be a mom". i never thought it was going to happen.

i had my share of relationships that never seem to last or seemed to be the perfect fit. and they always seemed to end before they even got started. it always ended with me thinking, i will never have a serious relationship that will turn into a marriage that will eventually make me a mother. that was until i found the one person who i know you wont believe it until it happens to you but they fit perfectly into my hands, and there were definitely fireworks the first time we kissed.

I have already told you about our back story, but this is about addison. August 1, 2010 was the day i found out i was pregnant. it was almost a month since our miscarriage and i was already pregnant? i was so excited because i was going to have a baby but scared at the same time, worried something was going to happen, i was going to miscarry again and then i think we knew we had a problem, or what if everything goes well, and then at the last moment i have a still born?

i made it up to my 40 week of pregnancy, i had extremely high blood pressure but they kept it monitored until that last appointment, i was going to see addison on the ultrasound and then i had to have my stress test, well my blood pressure kept reading over 100 so i went to up to labor and delivery and they monitored me there for a couple of hours as well. but since i was so close to my due date, they checked me in, at this moment, the one i had been waiting for, i was deathly scared.

labor lasted 13 hours, 4 active and my baby girl finally came out and presented herself to the world. she was 7 lbs 14 oz, and 21 inches long, and i was in love.

i have never been so deep in love in a matter of seconds. i couldnt wait to get out of the hospital and be a beautiful family. to this day she is 4 months and healthy, which i couldnt be happier for. she smiles all day long and sleeps pretty well. i love being at home and watching her grow and not rely on someone else to raise her. i cant wait to watch her grow up, become a toddler, then a child, a teenager, and a woman. i cant wait to watch her graduate, get married, and have her be a mother herself. i sometimes catch myself in tears because i cant believe i have it all, i am so lucky and then in the back of my mind i worry, could i lose it all just as quickly?